Shiv Martin's Blog

Emotions matter in conflict, but they’re often the hardest thing to talk about, especially for new mediators. I’ve seen this time and again in my own practice. Disputants often arrive at mediation appearing calm, rational, and composed, carefully avoiding any mention of their emotions. Yet, in my experience, emotions are what drive conflict; without them, there would be no dispute. When I encounter this, I turn to a question that has proven invaluable in my career: “What’s th

Workplace conflict, whether stemming from personality differences, misunderstandings, or issues like bullying and unfair treatment, can quickly undermine a company’s culture and productivity. An increasingly popular alternative is workplace mediation, a process that fosters open communication and helps resolve disputes through neutral third-party facilitation. Mediation not only addresses the root causes of conflict but also provides a constructive way to rebuild relationship

Eye contact is often hailed as a key element of effective communication, particularly in conflict management. However, in my experience as a mediator and trainer, its importance can sometimes be overstated. While eye contact can foster connection and understanding, it’s not universally beneficial, its effectiveness depends on the context, cultural norms, and the individuals involved. Take, for example, Indigenous Australian cultures. In many communities, avoiding direct eye c

Negotiation is an art, an instinct, and a skill. We are rarely taught how to negotiate in mainstream education and yet it is an indispensable part of all aspects of our lives. As children, we learn to negotiate by simply doing what works. We seek positive reinforcement, and once we make the connection between a particular negotiation style and rewards, we continue to use that style. For some of us this might mean cooperating, while others may be used to competing or demanding

Managing Workplace Conflict: Gradual or Sudden? “How did you go bankrupt?” “Two ways. Gradually, then suddenly.” - Ernest Hemingway, The Sun Also Rises While this quote originally describes financial ruin in Hemingway’s novel, it resonates with many types of conflict, particularly in the workplace. So, what can we do to prevent such a gradual yet sudden breakdown in relationships at work? The Gradual Decline Workplace relationships don’t typically fall apart overnight. The d

Can humour ever be used effectively to reduce tensions in meetings? In my work, I often facilitate some pretty heavy meetings and mediations. I work in the spaces of workplace conflict, regulatory complaints, investigations, and conciliation. There's nothing funny about the content of the work I do, but I know that laughter can go a long way towards making conflict work more effective and enjoyable. Let’s be honest, most of the people around my table as a conflict resolver us

As an experienced conciliator and trainer, I’ve worked extensively across diverse cultural contexts and supported individuals living with...

Having had the privilege of training with and working closely alongside Bill Eddy, I hold the deepest respect for his expertise and groundbreaking contributions to the field of dispute resolution. His High Conflict Personality (HCP) theory has provided a vital framework for understanding individuals who engage in persistent, intense conflicts, particularly within the high-stakes arenas of family law and workplace mediation. Throughout my career as a mediation and conflict re